My Heart Belongs to Eagle

Kristi Kay's post on The Swoon Society blog had me waxing nostalgic this morning. I am an Eagle Island person and was first introduced to the experience arriving in the fog. My family is lucky enough to have a cabin, Eaglecliff, on this magical island. My siblings, cousins and I all ran wild all over the island as kids. We played at the Schoolhouse on rainy days and ate Helene’s chocolate chip cookie’s while playing endless board and card games. On good days we hiked, fished, sailed and actually swam in the frigid water. First contact was in 1965. It is where I go to regain my serenity and decompress from life away. I wonder if Aaron was subjecting Kristi to the Island Relationship Test? My family jokes about it, but if a person doesn’t turn out to be an Island Person then that relationship is doomed. Friend doesn’t get it, forget it. Eagle is a place that can become part of your soul if you let it. Eagle is the most beautiful place I have ever been. The background of this blog is pictures of Eagle.

 http://theswoonsociety.com/2015/10/15/if-once-you-have-slept-on-an-island/comment-page-1/#comment-359

If once you have slept on an island
You’ll never be quite the same;
You may look as you looked the day before
And go by the same old name,
You may bustle about in street and shop
You may sit at home and sew,
But you’ll see blue water and wheeling gulls
Wherever your feet may go.
You may chat with the neighbors of this and that
And close to your fire keep,
But you’ll hear ship whistle and lighthouse bell
And tides beat through your sleep.
Oh! you won’t know why and you can’t say how
Such a change upon you came,
But once you have slept on an island,
You’ll never be quite the same.
— Rachel Lyman Field

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The struggle continues....
Sometimes I feel like a Conehead, you know them, the characters from Saturday Night Live, eating and drinking "mass quantities". Yes, I am a binge eater. Portion control is my downfall. Happily, I have discovered Nutirsystem D; billed as "Helping You Manage Diabetes." Yes, it helps with portion control. I am learning to embrace the hunger or eat lots of non-starchy vegetables. I am also learning that sometimes a glass of water is what I need more than something to eat.

I am walking every day with my dogs, Shylow and Delilah. Sometimes we go for a little drive to get to a different route to walk. They like riding in the car almost as much as the walk. It seems like I am getting more exercise walking with them than alone. Amazing how less than twenty pounds of fur and eight legs can drag me along at a pretty good clip.

Fleas, a problem for all pet owners.....
Who else has been really struggling with this lately? A scheduled trip to the Vet (Banfield at PetSmart) a few weeks ago pointed at something that helps more than the topical application of liquid poison. Nitenpyram tablets start killing the fleas within half an hour of getting the tablets down their throats. Ah, the joys of giving pills to a pet! No hiding the pills in food to get them down. With my girls it's shove the pill as far as possible in their mouths followed by holding their mouths shut until they swallow. Fun times! Look for Dog & Cat MD Quick Tabs in the doses right for your dog's or cat's weight. (Cheaper than the other brand and the same stuff.) The beauty of it is that it can be given to them every day if that's what it takes to break the egg to flea cycle.

Two things working against me in my search for the perfect job: age discrimination and fat discrimination. I can't change that I am pushing 60 even though I am told I don't look or act 60 (what does that even mean?). My ability to lose weight has been a constant struggle, but it is the thing I can change. I know I need to eat fewer calories and the better choices along with increasing my physical activity in order to lose weight. It seems like such simple things to do. The added complications of chronic metabolic disorders do not help. Other people have done it. I don't want to hit my 60th birthday in March still classified as morbidly obese. I want to be off all my diabetic medications, blood pressure and cholesterol medication. I won't give up my migraine prevention meds or my antidepressant even though I know they work against my weight loss goals.

My most recent A1C result (measurement of blood sugar control over time) was 7.1. This is much better than a year ago when I had hit over 14, which is seriously bad. My doctor wants me to get into the 6's. I need to find a way to work around my tendency to binge eat when I am stressed or depressed. Recently, I saw a program about people like me. Binge eating is now considered a medical condition along with bulimia and anorexia. It is like being a bulimic without the purging after the binge. It feels like something snaps inside me and I become an eating machine. I eat the worst things for my metabolism and diabetes. What I eat doesn't even have to taste all that great, it just has to be carbs.

I have been researching what to do to change and manage my issues. Atkin's doesn't work as I do need some carbs and it is too restrictive for a diabetic. It can cause kidney problems even in relatively healthy people. The kidneys and liver are vulnerable to damage from the diabetes and poor food choices.

The other issue I have is hypothyroidism. I had thyroid cancer several years ago and had the right lobe of my thyroid removed. The other half was supposed to take up the slack and didn't. I will be on Levothyroxin, a synthetic thyroid hormone, for the rest of my life. It has been difficult to find the right dosage. Sleep apnea contributes to a slower metabolism. I use a CPAP machine when I sleep and that does help. The incidences of apnea are down to 3 or 4 a night instead of the 300 that was measured with a sleep study.

The biggest key to change will be planning and following the plan. I am using the plan from "The Diabetes Breakthrough" by Osama Hamdi. The publisher's blurb states he is "A senior Harvard Medical School diabetologist and top exercise physiologist share a proven and effective 12-week plan to reverse diabetes, lose weight and ditch the medication for good." Obviously, it will take me a lot more time than 12 weeks to loose 140 pounds.

My goals in the 12 weeks left to 2015: the book says I should be able to healthily lose 60 to 70 pounds if I follow the plan to the letter. Realistically, considering what I know of myself, I am hoping for 2 to 3 pounds a week for a total of 30 pounds. If I work out as much as I need to and build muscle mass, 3 pounds a week is very do-able.  I have 24 weeks until my birthday. My plan is to be halfway to goal on my birthday and at goal a year from now. One of my problems in the past has been giving myself unrealistic goals. It is time to work smarter, not harder and avoid the failure mentality. Wish me luck and pray for strength and success!